Too Many Friends

“I don’t need any more friends.” This is a statement that not only have I heard multiple times but also resonates in my own life. It is something I began reflecting on in the post “Walking in it” and have continued to reflect on. The question is: “What does evangelism cost?” After considering my own life and also talking to others I am convinced that most of us are too busy to commit extra time to evangelism. So can some of our existing time be transformed, redeemed and more intentionally outward focused? Do we have to say “no” to some “good” things or relationships in our lives in order to make ourselves available for new relationships? A friend of mine recently talked about evangelism as being faithful in the small things: the smile, the greeting, the conversation, the question… I appreciated his perspective and admit that I can sometimes create an overwhelming picture of evangelism that is so daunting I am unable to even begin. But I would add to his description the need to be open for more. It is only of slight value if you greet someone but won’t talk with them, if you will talk but will not offer contact information, if you will meet for coffee but not in your home. If at the same moment you begin a relationship you are ensuring its end, this does little to further the gospel. However, relationships do start with smiles, greetings and small talk – so let us be faithful in the small things and be open to where God might lead.

Update: I have not been very faithful in walking my neighbourhood regularly but I have walked it more often. Last week I walked around the field with a Punjabi neighbour, he didn’t speak English very well and I don’t speak Punjabi so we just walked. Despite, the lack of conversation it was a pleasant walk and I found significance in the human ability to connect even without words. I am still looking for a venue or activity to attend or participate regularly in order to make myself available for those who need relationship.

Motivation and Relationship

Over the summer someone made a fake version of our blog and posted a critique:

Transparent Motives

what if you initiated a conversation with someone as outlined in the seminars at church and they then asked you where you learned about soul cravings and then you told the truth that you had been trained to initiate conversations for the purposes of conveying your spiritual beliefs and went on to confess that you were going to go back to your church and relay the outcome of the conversation.

i would think that they would feel manipulated and devalued. i feel like it would immoral to coerce someone into spiritual conversation intentionally keeping information from them.

Mike

Someone else posted a comment and response

But aren't we as christians commanded to preach the good news to people? In season and out of season according to Paul. the difference is love and sincerity. We preach not just because we are commanded to, but out of love and concern for their eternal salvation. We can easily get hung up on the details but if you are doing something out of love, your motive is pure and you have nothing to worry about.

Paul

I think Mike makes an excellent critique worth addressing and that Paul responds well. I was so sad that these comments and this discussion did not occur on our blog that I have copied them here in order to weigh in.

Mike’s post argues that there is an element of deception and depersonalization in evangelism, particularly this kind systematized of “relationship” evangelism… and so I ask the question: Is there a deception? Does evangelism training depersonalize “the non believer”? Have I depersonalized just now with that phrase?

Paul responds with both the Biblical mandate to witness and also love. I think to expand the argument might be to say that love is always intensely personal and deeply values the beloved. But is Soul Cravings evangelism always loving?

I think the truth is that evangelism in general has in the past often not been loving and not been personal. It has been tracts and blitzes and crusades. We systematize evangelism in order to empower people to share their faith. We have coined terms like relational evangelism and yet are too often clueless and unwilling to engage in real relationships. I would suggest that training in effective relationships would be more useful than evangelism training and that if our evangelism is ineffective it is a deficiency in our love and relationships not our conversational techniques. The assumption of the training is not that people are talking to strangers but friends, real friends. It is also assumed that the friendship exists on its own and that the person is not merely a target or a project. When we enter into relationships our purpose has to be to love, not to convert. Our relationship is strengthened as we share deeply of ourselves, including our faith, and allow the other to do likewise. For the relationship to be real both parties must be impacted by the life and ideas of the other and cherish the other regardless of conversion. We must love the other not only for their likenesses to us but also our differences, which allow us to learn from and challenge each other.

Finally, this blog is not about reporting about trophy conversations but rather discussing the process, success, failure, future and present need of Christian witness in Abbotsford. How do we do it? Why? Where? What attitudes do we have? Does our culture have? How is God moving? And how is he calling us to be a part of His work in Abbotsford? Soul Cravings is not a conversion system but some language and words to help those trapped in the Christian bubble speak intelligibly about their faith to others. However, it must be more than words! If we cannot say that we have experienced God’s Intimacy and a sense of Destiny and found Meaning as a result of faith, we have no right to promise these things to others. Soul Cravings offers us non-Christianese language to describe the Christian experience, it presupposes that we have a living, vibrant and active faith that is deeply fulfilling. Soul Cravings helps remind us that we are more like others than we are different.

Witnessing to Christians

In my last post I discussed a bit what might be called “accidental witnessing.” Some of my thoughts were particularly inspired by Jonathan Acuff’s post on the subject (stuffchristianslike.com). My questions today are: What about intentional witnessing to Christians? Does evangelism stop when we have prayed “the prayer” or do we continue need to hear the good news and experience salvation? Is there a difference between witnessing to Christians versus non Christians versus Satanists? What is it? Do we get more points for witnessing to Satanists?

So what is witness? Wikipedia describes a witness as a person with firsthand knowledge of an event through their senses. Witnesses are therefore able to testify to the even they experienced. I think this can help refocus some unhelpful perceptions regarding “witnessing”. I often feel like what we mean when we talk about evangelism or “witnessing” is a gospel presentation or “bait and switch” relationship building that is gearing up for the “gospel presentation”. In contrast, Wikipedia’s definition of witness helps me gain perspective and remember that it is actually about giving testimony to Jesus’ work in my life. I am so uncomfortable with “turn or burn” evangelistic “crusades” that I forget that evangelism is intimately connected with experiencing and recognizing God’s work in my own life and sharing those experiences with others. If I am not experiencing or recognizing God’s work in my own life, how can I share about it? How can I convince someone else regarding the reality of my faith and the reality of Jesus, if I am not experiencing it as real?

The beauty of this is that it is easy to talk about stuff that is going on in your life presently. We talk about stuff that’s going on in our lives, especially good stuff. I think this is why new Christians find it easier to talk about their faith, its news, it just happened, its affecting everything. Too often we have made salvation a onetime event that slowly becomes harder and harder to remember and talk about relevantly as it becomes farther away. I would like to suggest that salvation is also an ongoing event that we should be continually experiencing. I would also like to suggest that evangelism and witness is anything and everything you do that brings or draws anybody nearer to Jesus. With that being said go ahead and witness to your Christian and non Christian friends and any Satanists who will listen or spend any time with you at all. Talk about what God is doing in your life right now, and be there to love the people around you. If you aren’t sure what God is doing, sit down with a pastor, mentor or friend and think back on the past month and year specifically considering the question “How has God worked in my life?” Another option would be to consider checking out a spiritual direction session at the Mark Centre.

Personally, I have seen God’s provision in my job here at the church and driving an Ice Cream truck this summer. I had needed a flexible part time job to supplement my internship and nothing was coming up. In May I prayed with someone on the prayer team during a Sunday Service – by Tuesday I had the Ice Cream Truck job and started the following Monday. I also perceive God to be teaching me about loving people and being considerate of the ways each person is unique. What does it mean to “become all things to all men that by all possible means I might save some” (1 Cor. 9:22)? How do I adjust myself to people’s unique needs while remaining authentically myself? These are some questions I am sitting with and reflecting on as they are pertinent to some of my relationships right now.

How is God working in your life?

How have you experienced salvation recently?